Few things in this world are as sublime as Breakfast for Dinner. French toast. Omelettes. Waffles. There ain’t nothing I like better than sitting down with a plate of syrup-drenched pancakes, two fried eyes, a side of bacon, a side of sausage, and a pint glass of whole milk to watch The Biggest Loser.

But of course half of BfD’s appeal comes from the flagrant disregard of societal norms inherent in such an enterprise. And that’s also what made the original Chex Party Mix–you know, the kind you assembled yourself from assorted breakfast cereals–the “Sweetest Taboo”, as Sade liked to call it.

So I’m not sure what to make of this:

I dunno. Having the official sanction to eat breakfast after 10:00 AM takes some of the thrill out of it. Like, remember how drinking lye just wasn’t as fun after they passed the twenty-first amendment?

And what’s up with that claim that it has “60% less fat than regular potato chips”? Nowhere in its two dozen+ ingredients are potatoes even listed, so this is a literal case of “apples to oranges”, botanically speaking. They could have compared it to anything and been roughly as accurate. “1500 lbs. less fat than a bison!”?

Rating: On the one hand, this stuff ain’t bad. On the other, there’s not a lot of mix in this mix: in addition to the Chex themselves you got what appears to be bark and some yellowish stickie things, all of which taste exactly the same (i.e., like the seasoning, which is essentially salt, garlic powder, and “spices”). So I’m not sure I buy the back-of-the-package claim of “a variety of tastes and textures”, but maybe “moderate variation in shapes and shades of brown” got a thumbs down from the focus group. 65¢/$1.

Update: Commenter Luv2Spin just brought this to my attention:

Where by “this” I mean “my lunch” and by “attention” I mean “mouth”.

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